Sunday Morning Rides - 14th Edition

Destination Annah Rais Hot Springs - Sun 31st August 2008

Thinking back, there is no better word to describe our endeavor on this Independence Day but “Extreme”. We had again challenged ourselves to an even higher level of accomplishment with our Merdeka Ride - Destination Annah Rais Hot Springs. To show our act of patriotism, we sat down after the ride, in a make-shift kopitam by the roadside, mesmerized in watching the Merdeka Parade live on TV and at the same time counting our laurels of the day. This was the toughest ride since the formation of the SMR (Sunday Morning Ride) team and we were all mentally prepared for the eventual torment, but naively forgetting about our physical flabbiness. The amount of time and effort spent by the folks in preparation for this morning’s ride was astounding. Nic spent to a total of…..drum roll pls…. RM5 to get his rear wheels aligned. Just imagine that, I could have easily bought a big bowl of Laska with that kind of money. Yip must have KY gel-ed his squeaky brakes and Andrew bought a lot of kinky fruits and vegetables….bananas and cucumbers lah. Must have left some for the wife to use… ooops…. I meant eat. As for me, I had a pear and 2 packets of Ribena spiked with glucose apart from the usual bottle of diamond water. Mark, my cousin was nowhere to be seen, I guess he is still in China playing with those beautiful China girls with armpit hair. The recent olympics games might have educated them a bit to shave but hey, Mark likes furry animals. The journey started off at 5:50am with a 30min car ride to Kampung Karu.

Here we parked our cars and started relieving ourselves, the first of many occasions. Yes, I am documenting the number of times these buggers took out their willies and contribute however little to welfare of the environment. I am simply fascinated and flabbergasted with the amount of fluids that the human being can expel, even after vigorous sweating and yet still having the urge to pee. The winner of the Golden Shower Awards goes to Mr. Andrew Chai, followed closely behind by Mr. Yip Kai Ung. Frankly, I think u guys have bladder problems. Signs of getting old, folks! I bet when you guys are like 70, the loo would be your second home.

It was a hilly 42km round trip. The SHP (Severe Hill Phobia) syndrome, developed from our previous ride to Kampung Danu (See Sunday Morning Rides 5^th Edition) still haunts most of us. Andrew has no context of this and was unperturbed. He was not a member of SMR then and was still chauffeuring his kids to Sunday school. Now he is free from domestic chores and free to endure the torture that we throw at him.

The Torture, the Challenge, call it whatever you wish, is a hilly road that weaves through mountains and is not for the faint of heart, not even for some of the seasoned mountain bikers. But in this case, the challengers were driven by sheer stupidity, peer pressure and the occasional Singaporean “Kia Su” attitude.

The road to Annah Rais past through the gateway to Borneo Highland Resort. In reaching there, we experienced climatic changes as we ascended deeper into the mountainous region of Puncak Borneo.... until we reached the clouds.

It is as cool as Cameron Highlands. Water droplets quickly condensated on our sunglasses as we cut through clouds. Blurring our vision in this dream like world, we savour the fresh cool air. I reckon that most people of Kuching could hardly imagine that such as place exist and it is just an hrs' drive away from Kuching city.

Occasionally during long rides like this one, we would stop for short rests at strategic locations. This time we simply stopped along the roadside and it was out with the bananas. Andrew took his and Yip did the same.

Andrew stored his cucumbers on his saddle. Could not get it out and had to chew on it. No wonder he was smiling all the way from Kampung Karu. Bloody hell…. and we thought he was just happy.

Finally we arrived at the gateway to Borneo Highland Resort. It was bustling with people trying to hitch a ride up the mountain to the resort. Later we learned that it was the last day for the “Colours of Nature” exhibition. It was a floral exhibition up at the resort and the friendly guard told us that Dr. Mahathir would be coming in his helicopter later in the day. Ya Rite! So the “Sua Ku” people of Kuching were easily swayed to join in.

In the spirit of “Kia Su”, we soldiered on to Annah Rais, attracted by the hot springs that we could find out there. I would be damn surprised if it turned out to be anything like in Rotorua, NZ. I guess a mud patch with some bubbles would do for Kuching people to be amazed.

About four kilometers and one huge hill down the road, we discovered hills upon hills of vegetation, desecrated by open burning. Deforestation at our own backyard and year upon year during the dry season, we thought the haze was from Kalimantan. Andrew did his best to save the environment and tried to put out the fire with his willy. Go Andrew go…. pressure man… eh, how come still nothing lae?

We waved a passing motorcyclist down to ask for direction but only to find that the freaking road leads to Tebedok, a border town to the neighbouring country of Indonesian. Somewhere down the gravel road, somebody forgot to make a bloody turn. Fingers started pointing, mouths started swearing and Stephen Covey’s habits? What habits? Even Zinger Miller would flip in his grave if he was dead. Blame Nic, he was supposed to be the Iban guide. Basically, the rest of us were FBI. Think about this acronym for a while. Let me know if u need help.

It was already way, way past 9 o’clock and the curfew our wives imposed on us immediately came into effect. Suddenly we were but transformed from the SMRC (Sunday Morning Rides Club) to the KKBC (Kuching Kia Bo Club). Time to turn back regardless, Hot Spring or no Hot Spring. Screaming past the now congested gateway to the Borneo Highland Resort, we retraced our route back to Kampung Karu to collect our other more reliable form of transportation. But not before stopping by the roadside kopitam for our dose of patriotism.

I ended up with a leg cramp and a vow to come back as we failed to reach our intended destination. As Yip put it, the failure to reach our destination this time, is an incentive for us to come back to ride in this area next time.